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17 days you will be 27 can’t help but think about the last time we connected she told you what happened & you tore the house up asking who & why but still left with no answer too ashamed to tell you the other day I had a dream about it I know the person was a substitute maybe they all are & really I’ve been searching for you….there’s a doubt in me & there’s a hope in me …can you really survive this? we know loss to well I’ve lost you a few times this time seems different you’re finally consistent with disappearing maybe you are who I got that bad habit from too distance too closed in but open enough to feel like I’m there but never really am…sometimes you call & I can’t make myself answer just to hear your voice shakes me than I realize that you are not here that breaks me …

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