Category Archives: pain

(37)

I’ll only have you if you help me forget …I’ll only have you if you love me more than I love you…ill only have you if you heal me completely…had a few attempt but the challenge is too complex everything wired to my mind you think you’ve seen my heart but haven’t even got the invite yet…that good huh? just to being a woman gives me the power to but my power isn’t limited to manipulation ..what my mouth can do…what my body can do… I’ll leave the deceiving to you…can’t be consistent for long…trying to figure out why I don’t want to come over anymore….or why I call him & not you …some comfort never fades even after years of no communication just body language

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(27)

I can’t look at you without crying
I am apart of you
you have all the good parts
the way one tear slides down your cheek innocently when you are broken
knowing there will be plenty more to come
knowing I won’t always be your place to run
my heart will be aching too
when you find comfort tell me you’re safe
promise me you will always find a haven
create heaven wherever you go
be the peace

(24)

someone to share your blessings with
someone to share your secrets with no judgement
someone who fights & you see it clearly
someone who accepts & understands
someone who forgives instantly
someone who knows when to control when not to
someone who can balance it out for me
sometimes I’m scared
sometimes I want to fall short just because I see you
sometimes you get upset but your anger isn’t what I’m use to
sometimes that’s scary too
sometimes I see them in you
I know I’m not worthy of your inconsistency
You are going to have to let me go because I won’t do it…
I won’t do it

Journal entry (1)

laying in bed beside my daughter & yesterday I saw my father & realize how much love can change someone’s life..
I never seen my father so excited & calm around anyone like he is around us & his good friend lady & friendship is so important…us women can build up a man or break them down we have that ability.. I watch this woman help my father through friendship & love now she is teaching me the same it’s so frustrating & inspirational…sometimes what she tells me makes me take a few steps back & look at myself she is truly a guidance… & she says I am teaching her too which is crazy because I don’t look at myself as any type of inspiration at times…I love to help people but I barely know how to help myself… recently I have been trying to heal a few things in my life or past life the wounds are still so new… Life is definitely difficult but it’s so worth it & everytime I see my kids I am honored to be a mother. God chose me to be a mother & what a beautiful thing that is & God chose me to love the people who allow me to be in their lives & I am so happy to be apart of this world so happy