trying to find peace in a pit of fire…
I promise you that I’ll kiss you like you are the only one
I promise you I’ll fuck away the pain
I promise you that you can’t sacrifice yourself & still be happy & sane
I promise you I’ll abandon you
I promise you that actual good things don’t happen very often but you did & I’m afraid I’ll run away
I promise you I will
I promise you I will…
I understand alone time
I understand not wanting to talk about how you are feeling at a certain moment
I understand boundaries
I understand balance
I see your scars
I see your heart
I see how you contradict yourself trying to convince yourself that you’re not ready for love when in reality you are just afraid that love will leave you again…
but you pushing love away will make it leave….
you denying love existing will allow it to not exist in your life no matter how much someone wants to love you… no one is going to allow you to make them your own personal punching bag …
they do not deserve it not being loved
& You deserve love so please let it in..
I speak things into existence not believing it myself…
what if I told you I prayed for all sides of you to be revealed even sides I’m afraid of..
what if I told you I’m a light worker, you compliment the sun & your smile makes me forget my troubles
when you’re inside of me my scars heal , my heart gets weak & I surrender…
the thought of losing you brings tears to my eyes & I hate it…
have you ever felt like you were suppose to be somewhere for a reason & you don’t know why….well that is now…
my heart longs for you
my body craves you
but I’ll rather you walk away than stumble on your own heart
I know I’m not the only one who has loved you but I promise you I’ll be the only one to ever love you like this…
afraid that I’ll give my body away to someone that won’t understand that allowing you to have me after trauma is a battle every kiss , every touch , every time you dig deep inside me
I want to accept your flaws
I want to know you
I want to cherish every moment
I don’t want toxicity
I don’t want lies & deceit
I want truth & growing
I want acception & knowing
In the midnight sun
I’ll cross the ocean just to return to you
If you were light-years away I’ll take that chance to be with you
this bet is worth the hand
this bet is worth the lost of any man I met after you
they can never compare
they are not aware of what I need
The wants never was important to me
though I want your body next to me every night I won’t find someone to fill that void but I’ll hold myself tight….tight enough to convince myself that these arms belong to you
We won’t always be this calm the sunset before night hits when regrets are at your front door begging to be
chosen. I believe we will always admire eachother.
When someone’s presence is enough that’s when you know.
When you can look at them in their eyes & feel that they geuinuely care about your well being that’s when you know.
I know within love it takes alot of work maybe so much that you feel like you’ll fail at it because people have always told you that you will never amount to anything but you mean everything to me.
I’ll pour my heart out & I’ll continue to pray for you.
I’ll continue to master self love to the core that loving you will look like heaven on Earth.
You don’t deserve anything less than the greatest.
You don’t deserve anything less than what you mean to me.
The only thing I want from you is your presence I’m telling you that’s enough…